I entered Men’s Work in the early 1990s while living in London, England. An organization called Wild Dance Events (WDE) brought Michael Meade and Robert Bly to the UK for an event for men. My wife found out about it and encouraged me to go. (Sound familiar?) I went and afterward something was different; me. Within a few months, I was working for WDE and attending every event.
At these gatherings, we were taken on journeys through Meade’s storytelling and Bly’s poetry. And we were introduced to Malidoma Some, and his African wisdom. The themes introduced via Storytelling – fathers, mothers, Kings and Heroes – were mythic and relevant. The most impactful element of every gathering was individual men standing and expressing themselves. They shared how they experienced the theme in their own lives. This brought up anger, confusion, disappointment, and hope, expressed through yelling, screaming, weeping, and laughter. Most importantly, there was unfiltered, uncensored, and deeply felt expressions of each man’s truth.
One key observation after attending all these events, is that, had there been women present, much of what was said, would have either been withheld or peddled back and softened. The benefit of men gathering with men, in-person or virtually (I’ve participated in both) is there is an unspoken invitation to be more honest and revealing, to be less sure and in control, to show and express feelings and shed tears.
The myth “big boys don’t cry” is alive and well in today’s adult male community. We have learned to hold and repress feelings, to not be reflective or introspective, to not appear to be weak and needy. In suppressing the feminine, the Patriarchy has denied men the natural human qualities (typically labeled as feminine) that have been identified as weak, soft, undisciplined and disruptive. These basic human qualities include nurturing, caring, sympathy, compassion, and humility, to name a few. Men have been taught that “indulging” in these qualities will make them soft, weak, susceptible to being controlled or manipulated losers.
After all of these life-changing experiences I now facilitate In Search of the Sacred Masculine. This powerful initiation program offers a place for men to explore the full spectrum of human emotions and own them as strong and powerful, without having to translate that strength and power into competition and dominance. We explore qualities such as the desire to create, try new ideas, respond instinctively and intuitively, be courageous and lead others.
In Search of the Sacred Masculine provides a cauldron in which you can bring all of yourself, knowing that you’ll be honored, respected, and loved by your companions on this journey of self-discovery, self-expression, and growth. You will be challenged by the stories and the archetypes (Warrior, King, Visionary, Manifestor, and Wise Sage) and you will interact with and learn from the archetypes and each other.
Dare to explore yourself through this process. Join us on this adventure called In Search of the Sacred Masculine.